Dear Fast-Food Employees

I am sorry that you took offense to my commercial. For those who are offended, but have no fucking clue what the commercial was about, I play a fast food employee who was an aspiring rapper.

I know, I know, that's an amazing acting stretch for me. Especially since my sugah-momma/wife recently divorced me and took my entire fundage with her. I mean, I gotta do something.

Basically, what I'm saying is: all fast food employees fall into 4 groups: aspiring models, actors, actresses, musicians. High school kids working their first job. People in their mid-20s who are slackers living in the basements of their parents' homes and finally, old retirees who had the laughable thought that 12 years of Republican rule and a President who pissed away the entire budget surplus and social security funds would allow them to retire in moderate comfort. So don't get all pissy with me because I have the audacity to show what you really are. You serve a bunch of crap that people shouldn't eat, fucking ever. If an entire gaggle of you fuckers were to quit right now, the world economy wouldn't suffer some massive fuck blow.

In essence, I'm sorry that your jobs suck more than my wife on a Friday night, and I'm also sorry that you can't get past your own shitty existence.


Peace,
K.Fed



*edit Lyndsey Lohan's dad is prison. Any thoughts on how long before he was punked out by both the guards and his fellow prisoners?