It's great to learn. 'CAUSE KNOWLEDGE IS POWER!
If you ever read this blog and wonder, "how can a raging dickhead alcoholic, with the kind of paranoid delusions a 7-year-old on acid locked in a closet would have, write so well?"
It's because I write in the AP style. If you don't know what the AP style is, go to your local newspaper, TV newsstation, high school or college newspaper, and ask someone who's in-the-know. But be sure to properly introduce yourself and make sure they know why you're there. If humans have taught me anything, it's that you cannot ask someone a random question and get the answer you're looking for. Just try it sometime.
"Do you like carrots?"
"I...what?"
Jody knows what AP style is, but then again, she's a supermodel, and she has superpowers. Like being super smart, and having the super power to stun you. How does she stun me? you inevitably ask. By flashing you. She's got the kind of chest that if she were in the woods, and a bear were attacking her, all she'd have to do is flash the bear some upper torso skin. And then the bear, even if it had rabies and was super pissed off because some jackass just waltzed into the woods and kicked the bear in the testicles, would stop on a fucking a dime and go, "damn. That's a titty."
Personally, if I go into the woods, and I see a bear, I throw him a fat kid. Then I run, because fat kids are mostly gristle, and the bear won't like that. Jody also knows what AP style is because she went to fucking journalism courses in order to become a reporter. If you see her on the news, you won't pay any attention to the story.
"Tonight's top story: the dead have risen from their graves and are eating the living. We go now live to Adam, supa-fly badass zombie killer out in the field. Adam, what's going on?"
"Jody, how about later on, you and I go get dinner and go dancing afterwards?"
"Adam, the dead are all around you, and that's all you have to say?"
"I...you're beautiful."
See, human nature. You can't just ask someone a question when their mind is somewhere else. That's why you need proper introductions.
It's because I write in the AP style. If you don't know what the AP style is, go to your local newspaper, TV newsstation, high school or college newspaper, and ask someone who's in-the-know. But be sure to properly introduce yourself and make sure they know why you're there. If humans have taught me anything, it's that you cannot ask someone a random question and get the answer you're looking for. Just try it sometime.
"Do you like carrots?"
"I...what?"
Jody knows what AP style is, but then again, she's a supermodel, and she has superpowers. Like being super smart, and having the super power to stun you. How does she stun me? you inevitably ask. By flashing you. She's got the kind of chest that if she were in the woods, and a bear were attacking her, all she'd have to do is flash the bear some upper torso skin. And then the bear, even if it had rabies and was super pissed off because some jackass just waltzed into the woods and kicked the bear in the testicles, would stop on a fucking a dime and go, "damn. That's a titty."
Personally, if I go into the woods, and I see a bear, I throw him a fat kid. Then I run, because fat kids are mostly gristle, and the bear won't like that. Jody also knows what AP style is because she went to fucking journalism courses in order to become a reporter. If you see her on the news, you won't pay any attention to the story.
"Tonight's top story: the dead have risen from their graves and are eating the living. We go now live to Adam, supa-fly badass zombie killer out in the field. Adam, what's going on?"
"Jody, how about later on, you and I go get dinner and go dancing afterwards?"
"Adam, the dead are all around you, and that's all you have to say?"
"I...you're beautiful."
See, human nature. You can't just ask someone a question when their mind is somewhere else. That's why you need proper introductions.
posted by Adam at
9:47 PM
1 Comments:
AhaHHAHAAH...you're awesome. I'm having a shit day and you made me smile. :) tee hee
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