Kim Jong Il: the only world leader with the mind of a 13-year-old girl.

OK, so when American troops cross the DMZ (de-militarized zone for the morons out there) and essentially blow North Korea off the fucking map, I gotta be honest with you, I'm not gonna protest anything. Except for wondering what took them so fucking long to want to invade a country led by the winner of the Asian Elvis impersonator contest. Seriously, what took you so long? Nobody, not even the French, likes anybody from North Korea. They are the assholes of the world. Bono won't even try to feed the homeless kids there. He sees North Korean kids, and is like, "ehhh, fuck 'em!"

I knew it was bad news for everyone when Kim Jong Il announced he was gonna launch a missile at the U.S. just to see if he could. What the fuck kind of logic is he using on that one!?!? It's not like your my neighbor who just happens to be good with tools! You're the crazy, kooky leader of a country nobody wants! You lead the 5th largest MILITARY in the world, asshole. A military, that I feel compelled to remind you, was in a war from June 1950, until a ceasefire took effect in July of 1953. A war, according to various military-minded websites, is not officially over. How the fuck could you not know that a missile can go across an entire ocean and strike at just about any city on the West Coast? Answer: you did know, you just think everyone else is a big retard. When the reality of the situation is, you're a huge 'tard, and I feel compelled to make sure you know. I oughtta print this out, fly to North Korea, and say, "hey, kimmie fuck gibler! Read this, you stupid fuck nut!"

But I won't and you know why? I'm sure you already know. You HAVE to know. There's no way you can't know.

And if you're country DIDN'T have the ability to launch a missile across the sea before, then holy fuck shit. That means from the time you started as ruler until today, you kept people from opposing countries out of North Korea based solely on your insanity.

"What country do we invade next? North Korea?"

"Hey! Have you lost your goddamn mind? He looks like a Chinky Elvis! We should just leave him and his country right the fuck alone!"

This is probably the result of him being made fun of in Team America: World Police. You think when he was a kid, he got made fun of so much that people had to thank him for all the good times they had?